The Blogshevik

Acorn's Short Bus of Moronic, Leaving Daily From Stoopit, CT

Recently, my good friend and compadre, A Responsible American, wrote a piece about ACORN’S bussing of “tourists” to the homes owned by AIG executives. These tourists are members of The Connecticut Working Families Party, a coalition of disenchanted losers who find fault in the success of others. Their rolls are filled with individuals who have failed miserably in life and instead of pulling themselves up by the jack-booted-bootstraps, have decided to attack those who can afford to enjoy the fruits of their labor. Oh sure, some are quite upset at Bonus-Gate, but let’s be honest here folks, those that do well in business are rewarded by receiving  bonuses.  Of course, it isn’t the $5.00 Starbucks gift card these windowlickers are used to, but usually large sums of cash. The whole stink about the amount of bonuses received by AIG is in some part understandable;  it was our money after-all, but if you want the best and the brightest to lead a business to success, you reward them. Those particular bonuses were rewarded for completing tasks that were essential to AIG continuing as a viable entity and by golly, rewarded to those who didn’t create the mess in the first place. Think of it this way, you own that company now, don’t you want the business to survive? Surely mistakes were made, but in order for those mistakes to be righted, you need those who understand the mistakes and can, through that understanding, correct them.  Even when they weren’t the ones who actually made them.

It’s logical business sense. Oh sure, we could fire those that remain and replace them with the likes of Timmy (I Fell Down The Well) Geithner, but would you take that chance? It’s obvious by the disaster that TurboTax Timmy and those who prescribe to his “I Owe How Much?” version of tax cheating have created within the Dept of Treasury, that if you did allow them to fix the mistakes made,  AIG would find itself further down the vortex of poop.

So the questions remain.  How many of these yahoos from The Connecticut Working Families Party could get past the plaque that sits in the lobby of AIG without resorting to a “Hooked On Phonics” cheat sheet, let alone untangling the mess that haunts the books of AIG? I watched the video of its members reading from a prepared statement in front of one of the AIG executives home and it was apparent that we’re witnessing the results of a lack of oxygen while in the birth canal. To put it mildly, the members of The Connecticut Working Families Party are pretty fkng stupid. These people are the dregs of society, the unwashed, the moronic.

Since the zipperheads of TCWFP have found it necessary to invade the privacy of citizens that actually work for a living, it’s this author’s responsibility to do the same. I’ve ripped off the photos of some of its members from here, I certainly hope they don’t mind. Apparently, 40 members of TCWFP made it to the event, hoping aboard the Short Bus of Moronic. This is just a sampling.

The Connecticut Working Families Party

Say Hello To Joe Dink-in.

Joe Dink-in is the Grand Poobah of TCWFP. In addition to possessing a head that the monster from “Alien” (starring Sigourney Weaver) would find scarier than shit. He doesn’t like capitalism as evidenced by his rantings here. If you visit that link, notice the header image and see if you can find anyone that seems to be lacking in food. Apparently, they aren’t having a hard a time finding a Big Mac, they just want to super-size that order of fries and a biggie soda on your dime.

Regardless, Joe Dink is a proponent of the whole redistribution of wealth thing and at the time of this writing, it’s unknown if Joe has moved out of his parents house in Hartford, Connecticut.

We're not sure which one is Jon Green, but I think it's safe to assume it's the short shit.

Here’s Jon Green, the rabble rousing-cow tipping champion of Hartford, CT. The putz next to him is unidentified, but it appears as if Jon Green has something poking the zipperhead in the ass. It’s not confirmed, but it’s rumored that members of TCWFP enjoy the “ol’ wink wink, nudge nudge, say no more” insertion of foreign objects into the back 40.

Another rumor that’s surfaced on the Internet is that Jon is also a closet fan of Sean Hannity. I’d like to make it perfectly clear though, Jon fears for his life and if this rumor were to be substantiated, more than foreign instruments would be inserted into Jon’s bwaahaahaa.

Yeah, we thought so too…best leave it at that.

Future Treasury Dept Appointee Brian "Snork" Mills

Brian’s social networking site is rumored to state that he enjoys nose-picking, pit sniffing and smelling other peoples farts. The POTUS has apparently expressed interest in appointing Brian Mills of Hartford, CT to one of the sixteen vacant treasury positions, stating, “Mr. Mills possesses and shares the talent and dedication of Secretary Geithner.  I want to insure that we fill these vacant positions with like-minded individuals.” We certainly can’t argue with that now, can we?

Assad "Mama Mia" Jackson

Assad “Mama Mia” Jackson of Hartford, CT is rumored to note on his social networking site that he’s a huuuge fan of the Swedish rock group “ABBA”.  Mr. Jackson also states that when and if he comes into possession of the “Great Obama Redistribution” funds promised him, he’s planning a trip to Jamaica so he can  fulfill the dream of a lifetime, visiting the band on their home turf.

Uhh, ya know….best leave that alone, too. Power to the people Assad!

Dianna "Hogwart" Vazquez

Dianna “Hogwart” Vazquez is apparently a Harry Potter fan at 23 years of age. That can’t be confirmed, but it’s the skinny on the Internet. Speaking of skinny, it’s rumored that Dianna boasts of losing 300 pounds on a diet of bamboo shoots and Double Quarter Pounders, shedding the poundage and achieving her goal of beginning 2009 at a svelte 295 pounds. Way to go, Hogwart!!

Stacey Zimmerman & Her Spouse Bart

Stacey “Woof” Zimmerman of New Haven, CT is said to (yet to be confirmed) enjoy long walks at the dog park with her husband of 10 years, Bart. Again, this can’t be confirmed, but Bart and Stacey have been able to weather through marital problems in 2008. Bart has been accused of “enjoying an unusual relationship” with a chihuahua named “Maggie”, who just happens to live under the overpass adjacent to the flood control channel Stacey and Bart share in New Haven.

It’s really is nice seeing couples work out their differences and this blog wishes both Stacey and Bart the best of luck…..bad Maggie!…BAD!

This blog is the work of one individual and does not necessarily reflect the opinions of anyone linked or mentioned within the blog itself. If you’re reading this disclaimer and the opinions expressed by The Blogshevik bother you, you’re an idjit. I reserve the right to disown any statements made in this blog and reserve the right to point the blame towards my wife who makes me do shit that I don’t want to do. I also reserve the right to point blame towards bus drivers who smell funny, white women who reek, democrats, republicans, that fkng pigeon that keeps shitting on the patio chairs in the backyard, Glenn Beck, Sean Hannity and that old guy on FOX, Bill O’Reilly. This is a work of political parody, bad political parody but parody nonetheless. I’d also like to place blame for my fkuptedness on the dumbing down of America, allowing a fckwad like Obama to actually sit behind the desk in the oval office. I’d also like to thank Nancy Pelosi, Dianne Feinstein, Sen Chris Dodd, Barney Frank, Chuckie Rangel, Al Sharpton and Ted Kennedy’s clone for bringing stupid back into fashion.

Thank you

Robert John, The Blogshevik